HOW TO EXUDE CONFIDENCE
So what is the importance of developing confidence ?
Because your confidence is key for your enjoyment of everyday life and for your success in your professional life or your business.
You see….your thoughts affect your feelings, which affect your behaviour, the decisions that you make and the successful outcomes that you get. So it is absolutely key that you develop self awareness and self control and have a strategy for moving forward.
Some people might think, what’s the big deal!….and that’s ok because maybe they are confident and that’s a good thing, but not everyone is and it can massively impact your life
Positive psychology and has actually confirmed the benefits of developing self confidence are to achieve freedom from self doubt, from fear and anxiety, from social anxiety, it creates less stress, gives you more energy and motivation to act and helps you interact with other people as well.
These things are all really important in our life and our profession and our business.
Creating Confidence just gives you that sense of being grounded, able to feel comfortable in yourself to move forward, and to achieve your goals and success.
I was full of self doubt, fear and anxiety.
So, if you already know me and my story, you will know that I had terrible issues of confidence growing up and until I was about 38 when I was able to do the inner work I needed for positive change.
I was full of self doubt, fear and anxiety.
My social anxiety was terrible and I regularly would have cancelled going out ….and then I beat myself up for cancelling because I then felt that I was letting people down.
I became stressed and depressed, and didn’t have the motivation to change because my mind was so filled with ‘what if’s’
But here is the thing and this is important….I completely changed this around and so can you as Im going to show you.
Im literally going to give you a strategy for being the confident you.
So right now perhaps you are Mindreading what you ’think’ other people are thinking about you…and lets face it …we do not know what other people are thinking, we are just making it up based on our fears.
Maybe you are even generalizing the worst case scenarios like ‘nothing works out for me’, ‘I always fail’, ‘I cant do anything right’.
Or maybe you are responding to fearful emotions rather than taking responsibility for your thoughts and emotional state….remember….your thoughts effect your emotions, which affects your behaviour , your decisions and outcomes you get.
So my purpose here is to guide you and give you the steps to take to bring the confidence to your work and your life.
However sometimes there’s deeper work that you need to do which is exactly what I do with my 1:1 clients in my Mindset Coaching Programme. So if you have an issue, please private message me, email me or I’m happy to get on call with you and help you in what way I can.
If you’ve got questions or comments please let me know what’s going on for you.
So what are the steps to help you to EXUDE CONFIDENCE
Well first of all you need to do some groundwork;
What is Important to You in your life, in your business, in what you want to achieve,
When you know what is important to you in any specific area you have a sense of purpose, you are more focused, you feel more comfortable in your own skin.
Stop Giving Away Your Power. So it’s about valuing yourself. If you don’t value yourself you are putting yourself in second place, you’re giving your power to other people. You are putting their views and opinions before yours. Developing self respect, and an expectation of respect from others also is vital for self esteem.
Believe in You. Okay, so this is really about really believing in your capabilities and having an ‘I can’ mindset., enabling you to approach any situation with a sense of confidence.
Take Responsibility for Your Emotional State. FEEL Confident ! So, if you’ve ever felt confident before you know what that feels like and you can choose to feel this way.
Your emotions are the first sign for you that you are not choosing positive and supportive thoughts, you are not focusing on what you want to achieve. Emotions are information, It’s really important that you learn to notice and to take control of your thoughts and emotional state.
Choose the thoughts that best support you. So this is what I mean by taking responsibility.
When you have an ‘I believe I can ‘ mindset, you can step into that state of feeling confident.
So now you are ready to EXUDE CONFIDENCE.
You know when someone is really confidence they just have a certain energy about them don’t they? It literally just exudes from them.
Right away you have confidence in that person because they have it in themselves. So….what is it that you’re seeing? And how do you do it too ?
But first here is an important point…
Confidence is not a showy thing, its not arrogant or pushy. For example, if you are quite an introvert or a quiet sort of person and you think that you cant be one of these outgoing confident people, it’s not about being showy, arrogant ,or even extroverted. it’s just a sense of comfort, of knowing your own ability and feeling ok with just being you.
I am an introverted person, And I now have that sense of calm, grounded, knowing in myself that I can show up, just as me…. Not the me that used to torture myself with self doubt and fear and anxiety, but that person that just exudes confidence, quietly and calmly, and that’s what you are going to learn today .
Confidence is knowing yourself and being able to be comfortable in your own skin.
Its being open and curious.
You see confidence doesn’t entertain those irrational thoughts or fears.
Confidence is empowering.
So when you go through these steps of; Knowing what’s important to you, Owning your own power, Believing in yourself, Taking responsibility for your state….. then you can Exude that confidence by;
SHOWING UP WITH I.N.T.E.N.T.
You’ve got to show up with positive intent. For me intent is two questions.
What is it that I want to achieve ?
How do I achieve it ?
These steps are my steps of how do it.
So there are three aspects to this; knowing yourself and your purpose, which includes your area of expertise or specialism….You know your subject ! You have lots of knowledge and experience !
…so really affirm those to yourself.
You know who it is that you’re going to serve in your work, or business …so your client. If its is an actual event you know the purpose of that event and what it is that you want to achieve at that event.
And the third part is then what you want to achieve.
Because heres the thing……..being prepared is absolutely key to feeling confident. If you go into any situation unprepared, you’re going to feel wobbly. You are not going to be ready for what comes your way, so being prepared with all this information and affirming what you have is absolutely key.
(k)Now Your Values
Know who you are, what you stand for and know your boundaries.
This is about being you….authentically you… and working with integrity. You don’t need to try to be impressive or be like someone else, or who you think someone else wants you to be, you’re uniquely you, and you have you own values and sense of purpose.
This s a massive part of confidence. If you trust yourself to be able to respond to anything that comes your way that you can be flexible enough to respond, that no matter what happens you can learn from it you will feel calm and confident in yourself.
There is no failure only learning !
It can seem a little bit scary but actually when you just have that trust, that faith in yourself, that knowing that you have the resources available to you, and you can respond to anything that comes your way with ease.
Be equipped with the resources that you need for that day, for that event, for that meeting. This includes your own personal resources. You are a resourceful person. You have confidence available to you. You have knowledge. You have skills. So really connecting with those things mean that you’re equipped to deal with any situation which comes your way.
This includes your positive focus. So making sure you focus on what you want to achieve, not on the what ifs and maybes but on what you want to achieve.
Visualising the success is absolutely key.
So you may not have noticed before, but when you think of a scenario that you’re going to deal with which may cause you some anxiety, you momentarily visualize the outcome that you’re thinking of.
So if you’re thinking of things like … What if I’m not good enough…. what if I fail….then that’s what you’re organising your mind towards. That’s not what we want. So visualising your success is absolutely key.
Nurturing these habits with a daily practice, so that your positive thoughts, your emotional state, and what you want to achieve become your new pattern of thinking. In NLP we refer to creating a new neural pathway.
Time to step into it
So now its time to step into the confident you, to EXUDE CONFIDENCE.
You have to actually show up as the confident you. Remember that confident person we talked about, and how they exude confidence. It’s now time for you to show up as that person.
Now you know what is important to you
You are owning your own power
You believe in yourself
You feel confident
You show up with INTENT
You are linking to all the information and knowledge that you have about yourself, your client, and what you want to achieve
You know your values and you act with integrity
You know your boundaries
You completely trust in yourself and your ability to respond and to be flexible and to learn.
You’re equipped with all your resources your positive focus, you are visualizing success.
You are nurturing those habits daily.
Wow. …..Are you then ready to step into it.
If there is one thing that I absolutely want you to take away from this blog today …its this….
Make stepping into the confident you a daily practice !
When you are showing up for your work, your business, your life …it is vital that you take responsibility for the energy that you bring and that you intentionally create the energy and focus that will serve and support you best.
You’ve got decisions to make.
You’ve got a million different roles to fulfil and tasks to complete.
Imagine rather than just responding to what’s going on in your mind…You take responsibility for setting yourself up for the day by doing these things that we’ve talked about….this is literally a strategy for you to step into the confident you every day, or anytime you choose.
I think that’s pretty empowering!
Follow these simple steps and exude confidence. The more you practice this, the more this will just become your new normal pattern and you will discover that you can connect with people on a real level and be able to enjoy the journey x
So, thank you for taking the time to read this blog. I hope this has been really helpful.
Your feedback is important to me so if you have any questions or any comments I would love to hear from you. Contact me at; https://joblack.co.uk/contact
If you would like to receive my free report
‘THE 10 BENEFITS OF CREATING THE CONFIDENT YOU’
you can access it here; https://joblack.co.uk/funnel
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